• About Us
  • Beer Recommendations
  • Erotica
    • 12 Eggs, Garlic Bread, and a Bale of Hay
    • Porcelain Nights: Call of the Wild
    • Tearing Me Apart
    • The Modern Man
  • Movie Reviews
  • Sponsors
  • The Electric Honeygrass Experience

Booze and Other Nonsense

~ Musings of a psychopathic alcoholic, raconteurs, film buff, and more!

Booze and Other Nonsense

Monthly Archives: October 2013

Beer Review #55: Leinenkugel Canoe Paddler

10 Thursday Oct 2013

Posted by Vodka Barf in Beer Review

≈ Leave a comment

Tags

Beer Review, Canoe Paddler, Leinenkugel, Wikileaks

Things I Learned from Wikileaks

  • Mitt Romney had a butt plug in for the first and second Presidential debates.
  • You’re supposed to poop between 3 and 19 times a day.
  • Blue is the best flavor.
  • Up, Up, Down, Down, Left, Right, Left, Right, B, A.
  • Led Zeppelin I is better than Led Zeppelin IV
  • Nothing feels better than getting hit on by a gay guy.
  • Nobody knows where Glenn Beck was on 9/11
  • Kanye West is illiterate.
  • None of you follow the Facebook page or follow me @BoozeTweets
Leinenkugel Canoe Paddler

Leinenkugel Canoe Paddler

Appearance: Fairly clear, the color would give an 1840’s prospector a rager. Active, bubbles seem to be without end. The head is eggshell white and almost immediately eliminated. All things considered, this is an enticing beer.

Aroma: Pleasant. Muted sweetness, lots of grain, a cookies in the oven kinda smell. It’s a very mild aroma, and very one note, but it’s an awesome not so why not give it a good strum or two?

Taste/Mouthfeel: Non-existent. There is absolutely no flavor to describe. No malt, no hops, just a lingering bitterness. It’s actually quite impressive that they got a beer to be this neutral yet have such a nice smell. I’ll go out on a limb and say that it’s slightly grainy. The mouthfeel is pleasing, a velvety medium body and quite crisp, and I may get some banana or mango in the aftertaste. I may just be forcing that though.

Overall: This beer was all oingo, no boingo. Not bad, really, but it’s not something that I’d be happy to see waiting for me in the fridge. It was definitely beer, and I mostly enjoyed everything about it other than the taste. 65/100.

Up Next: Trolling Craigslist 11?

Beer Review #54: Blue Moon Agave Nectar Ale

08 Tuesday Oct 2013

Posted by Vodka Barf in Beer Review

≈ 2 Comments

Tags

Agave Nectar, Blue Moon, Chuck E.

Apparently you need a reservation to get into a Chuck E. Cheese. The crew and I just wanted some top-tier pizza and to throw on a good drunk while catching our favorite band. Here’s the e-mail I wrote to the Chuck to get a reservation.

Dear Sirs,

I’m inquiring about booking a party for my son Jeremy. Jeremy is a sweet, sweet boy that’s had an unnatural fascination with your anthropomorphic mouse for as long as I can remember. As such, I thought a very special treat for him would be a visit to one of your establishments later this month. I have several questions.

First, Jeremy is a severely handicapped soon to be 25-year-old boy. As such, it will be him, my wife, a few of the residents from his group home, and myself attending. None of us are actual children. Is that a problem?

Second, Jeremy can be a very creepy boy when he sees your eponymous mouse. After commercial he sits, tranced, with a crooked smile as saliva builds in his mouth until he utters a low, chilling “Chuck Eeeeeeeeee”. Can we be assured that this won’t keep the staff from performing?

Third, how much weight can your toilets support?

Finally, do you serve alcohol? I will need it.

Thank you for your time. I know that this sounds insane, but this is a very serious inquiry from a loving father that appreciates levity and has too little patience.

On to the boooooooze!

DSCN0190

Appearance: Painfully clear and piss-poor yellow; like that of the urine of a dehydrated man. The head comes on strong, a nice off-white that foams up big, but it mutates into a thin, weak ring. There is almost no activity from carbonation. A troubling sign for me.

Smell: The aroma really jumps out of the bottle as soon as you start to pour. Lots of big grain smells. There’s something sweet that’s hard to place that I’ll assume is agave. With my nose really deep in the glass it smells like sweet Heineken. Don’t know if that’s helpful, but there you go.

Taste/Mouthfeel: Thin and crisp in the mouth, in a very enjoyable sort of way. It’s not as sweet as I had expected, but it is sweeter than most other ale. Some of the wheat comes through and possibly a bit of caramel. I’m getting nothing by way of hops and there is hardly an aftertaste.

Overall: The agave makes for an interesting flavor that suits beer better than that horrible watermelon abortion, but I still don’t care for the gimmick. All of the flavors are so sweet and with no contrast they are a bit overwhelming. I suppose this could be nice on a hot day, out in the sun, but this is not something anyone should ever consider drinking even semi-regularly. 61/100

Remember to share, like, favorite, Tweet us, join the Facebook group, and avoid becoming sexually attracted to your children. I get in Twitter wars with minor celebrities so don’t miss out.

Categories

  • Beer Review
  • Behind Closed Doors
  • Humor
  • Lists
  • Movie Review
  • Reader Mail
  • Story Time
  • Trolling Craigslist
  • Uncategorized

Get Updates Through Facebook

Get Updates Through Facebook

Twitter Nonsense

My Tweets

Enter your email address to follow this blog and receive notifications of new posts by email.

Sites I Like

  • Columbus Food and Beer
  • Fleeing Nergal, Seeking Stars

Ultimate Six Pack (Six Highest Rated Beers)

  • Anchor Porter
  • Franziskaner Weissbier
  • Murphy's Stout
  • Founders Breakfast Stout
  • Great Lakes Edmund Fitzgerald
  • Great Lakes Blackout Stout

Recent Posts

  • 2022 Year-End Lists! December 30, 2022
  • 2021 Year End Lists! December 29, 2021
  • 2020 Year End Lists! January 3, 2021
  • 2019 Year End Lists January 1, 2020
  • Beer Review #87: Kirkland Signature APA (Costco Adventures #1) December 13, 2018

Archives

  • December 2022
  • December 2021
  • January 2021
  • January 2020
  • December 2018
  • October 2018
  • February 2018
  • January 2018
  • December 2017
  • November 2017
  • October 2017
  • August 2017
  • March 2017
  • February 2017
  • January 2017
  • October 2016
  • September 2016
  • August 2016
  • July 2016
  • June 2016
  • May 2016
  • March 2016
  • December 2015
  • August 2015
  • May 2015
  • April 2015
  • February 2015
  • January 2015
  • December 2014
  • September 2014
  • August 2014
  • July 2014
  • June 2014
  • May 2014
  • April 2014
  • March 2014
  • February 2014
  • January 2014
  • November 2013
  • October 2013
  • August 2013
  • July 2013
  • June 2013
  • May 2013
  • April 2013
  • March 2013
  • February 2013
  • January 2013
  • December 2012
  • November 2012
  • October 2012

Ignore This

  • Register
  • Log in
  • Entries feed
  • Comments feed
  • WordPress.com

Contact Us

Send Mail

Facebook

Twitter

Copyright 2012-2021

Blog at WordPress.com.

Privacy & Cookies: This site uses cookies. By continuing to use this website, you agree to their use.
To find out more, including how to control cookies, see here: Cookie Policy
  • Follow Following
    • Booze and Other Nonsense
    • Join 46 other followers
    • Already have a WordPress.com account? Log in now.
    • Booze and Other Nonsense
    • Customize
    • Follow Following
    • Sign up
    • Log in
    • Report this content
    • View site in Reader
    • Manage subscriptions
    • Collapse this bar
 

Loading Comments...